The joys of mental illness.

Help me Jewish God! Help me Tom Cruise!

Oh god oh fuck what the hell is going on help me

Last night, I was convinced that if I stepped outside my house something terrible would happen to me.  Now, this isn’t terribly odd in and of itself – I usually feel that way whenever the rent is due after all, even when though I make more than enough money to keep a roof over my head – but yesterday was different.

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Past the point of frustration.

Where's the Tylenol?


Yesterday, I almost took a baseball bat to my computer.  The only thing stopping me from shooting it instead is that ammunition can be expensive and I didn’t have a baseball bat.

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The other, other, other white meat.


Om nom nom nom.

Horsemeat: it’s what’s for dinner if you live in Europe at the moment.  This means that for the most part it’s “out of sight, out of mind” for most Americans, or the butt of dog food and glue factory jokes, but then something happened the other day that raised my hackles.

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The death of common sense.

I once took a campaign contribution THIS big!

Look at all the fucks I give for your freedoms.

I hate the fact that my primary source is the New York Post, but credit where it’s due: while we were all out and about enjoying our weekend, the Post‘s Brad Hamilton and Susan Edelman broke a news story about how New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg has pushed forward with the latest phase of his plan to strip the right to make basic decisions from New Yorkers.

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Here we go again.

I took Japanese for 4 long semesters in college.  It sucked.

In honor of our Japanese Overlords.

So the big “news” this week was that Sony held a press conference where they showed off the new, fancy version of their trademark DualShock console controller, trotted out a few flashy game demos and movies, and dug up the least socially awkward game developers they could find in order to announce that the PlayStation 4 would be coming by the end of this year.

The question is, does anyone really give a shit at this point?

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Selling out to Mark Zuckerberg.

Well, I finally did it – I broke down and created an “Official” Facebook page for my “professional” life, which includes both this blog and my published fiction.  I decided it was time to separate the two.  This gives everyone an opportunity to avoid my asinine, foul-mouthed ramblings by simply not clicking that stupid “Like” button on the new page.

Of course, it will be a devastating blow to my ego if nobody likes it.  So here I am, begging you to help me avoid trying to disembowel myself with a tuning fork in a fit of depression.  Click that stupid “Like” button and I’ll love you long time.

Up the irons!


The Periodic Table of Metal.

You may not be aware of this, but I absolutely love heavy metal, and I don’t mean the kind you find on the Periodic Table of Elements.  Not that I have anything against chemistry;  let’s be honest, feldspar might be pretty bad ass but it never sold out Madison Square Garden.

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