So once again it’s some godawful hour of the morning and the wife and I are staying the night at the Worst Hotel In the World. Now, don’t get your knickers in a twist: everything’s fine. We’re just staying overnight as a precaution, based on the particularly harrowing adventure we had yesterday afternoon.
It all started innocently enough with a regularly scheduled visit to my wife’s OB/GYN. The pregnancy is deep into week 32 at the moment, so her doctor wants her coming in twice a week for an ultrasound and what’s referred to as a “non-stress test” (NST), which involves my wife sitting in the world’s most uncomfortable Barcalounger while a nurse squirts gel all over her stomach and slaps a couple of ultrasonic microphones on her; the purpose of this isn’t to annoy the hell out of my wife but to monitor our daughter’s heartbeat and movements for a good 20 minutes.
The wife has had this NST done a few times without incident, but towards the tail end of yesterday’s test she began feeling dizzy, lightheaded, and nauseous. On top of that, her blood pressure started spiking, so the doctor’s office called in the EMTs to take her across the street to the main hospital, where she spent several hours being poked and prodded in an effort to ascertain just what the hell is going on with her now. The tests were – as usual – inconclusive, so now we’re spending a lovely night in the perinatal unit of Cedar Crest Hospital so they can make sure that she doesn’t spontaneously combust or something.
I’ve already rushed home to gather some needed items – phone chargers, tablets, comfortable clothes – and we’ve bedded down for yet another uncomfortable night. The only saving grace is that there’s free WiFi provided by the hospital – yet wouldn’t you know it that the signal we can pick up in our room is a bit on the weak side; trying to browse the internet is about as useless and frustrating as using dial-up to download porn.
This will hopefully just be a 24 hour stay, as I think we’ll both lose our minds if we end up spending the whole weekend incarcerated in this place. The only good thing is that the visitor chair in this room actually folds completely flat; I might get more than just 45 minutes of sleep!